It’s the middle of the night and I’m sitting in dad’s hospital room, a room I have grown accustomed to this past 10 days. A room I didn’t expect to be in, not now, not ever. A room that I wish we weren’t in, especially not today… not on my last day here. I so wish I could be typing this from home. I’ve been hoping that dad would get to go home this week sometime, but here we are.

I got a call from my sister on Friday morning the 16th as Lauren and I were packing. It was our last day of our Honeymoon and we were about to make the drive home.

“Dad’s in the ICU”

“What?!”

“Yes, he couldn’t breathe this morning. They found blood and fluid in his lungs.”

“WOW, Ok… I’ll call mom as soon as I’m on the road.”

When I talked to my mom I learned that He was in critical condition and the doctors where giving him hours to days. She told me that it was up to me whether I wanted to go now or come after.

Lauren and I got here Saturday afternoon (after a two hour delay) and came straight to the hospital. I didn’t know what to expect as I walked through the doors of the ICU, I was nervous and scared… I found dad laying in bed, with all sorts of tubes and cables coming out of his fragile body. He looked pale and was definitely in a delicate state. I grabbed his hand and he opened his eyes.

“You’re here.”

“Yes sir.”

“Good”,”I lost a lot of blood you know.”

“I know, are you feeling ok?”

“I’m ok. I think you can’t stay in here long, go be with your mom.”

I saw the X-Ray that they took earlier that day and his left lung didn’t show up in it. It was full of blood/fluid which was why he couldn’t breathe and was a blank spot on the X-Ray. I spoke with the nurses and they told me that he had lost 4 liters of blood. That didn’t resonate until I googled how much blood we have in our bodies… about 6 liters… Yikes.

I went back into the ICU moments later and spent some more time with dad. He says to me,

“You need to go home and wash the cars, sweep the garage, there’s two bulbs that need to be changed, there’s a tile that has come of in the gym, and just walk around and see what else there is to do. I haven’t been able to do any of that so you need to go take care of it.”

“Yes sir.”

How interesting is it that my dad is in critical condition, but what’s heavy on his mind is things that needs to be done in the gym? Things that he has not been able to do, things he’s taken care of his entire life. I can only imagine how tough it is for him to just lay in bed all day long. He’s led an active lifestyle his entire life and to be in bed must be torture for him. He always said stuff like, “Exercise is life”, “Working is living”, “I can’t just sit here, I need to go do something”…

He was taken out of ICU on Monday morning. Hallelujah! His vitals are stable and have been for the past week. The struggle now is his continual bleeding. There’s a tube coming out of his side going into this reservoir and it has been filling up to an average of 1300ml a day. They’ve tried twice to stop the bleeding with some procedure but it hasn’t worked. They’re coming in tomorrow to try it a third time with some different medicine. I’m praying to Jesus that this procedure will work and his bleeding will stop. I spoke with the doctor before she left and asked her a couple of questions.

“What do you think?”

“We’re going to try the procedure a third time with a different medicine and see if that works. We can’t keep the tube in there for a lot longer because it can get infected. So we’re going to try the procedure again and go from there. He’s oozing blood from his upper torso, its not a single source which makes it difficult.”

“I see, and if the procedure doesn’t work?”

“He may just stay like this until he passes. I believe this is the final stretch. It’s all in the hands of God.”

“Thank you doctor.”

As I sit here, watching my dad get some sleep, I have no words. I have no words to describe my feelings, my thoughts, my expectations… I just want him to get better. I want him to get up off that bed and walk out this hospital proclaiming the work that the Lord has done in him. I can only image the effect that would have on so many… to see him go through this and then get up and be a testimony of the power of God.

There was an article published on the paper last week entitled, “Master Bong Kyung Song, Master of Masters of the Martial Arts”. A long time friend of my dad who works for the newspaper called and said they wanted to do a Special Report about him. A full page report on my dad and his work in Honduras. What an honor.

I think to myself about how amazing it is that dad has led a life to where people who know him want to honor him in different ways. I’ve seen student after student come by and visit him. Some that haven’t been around for years have heard that he’s sick have come running with tears in their eyes.

“You’ve taught me so much Master.”

“Being your student was one of the highlights of my life Master.”

“You’re like a father to me Master.”

“We love you Master.”

I stop and think how much my dad has poured into his students. I think about the lessons taught and learned. I think about how he has brought up so many students with discipline, respect and honor. I think about all the trophies and the diplomas on the wall. I think about impacted generations as just the other day I saw a grandfather, father and son come to the gym together.

I think about all the stories he has shared with me, like the one where his first job interview was a fight against the biggest guy in the Honduran Police Academy. The academy director told him, “beat him and you can teach us”… he knocked him out. I mean, who has stories like that!

I think about him being a church planter, I think about him being a role model, I think about his prayers and special songs. I think about how he prayed with me every morning before school, I think about how he cooked us breakfast just the way we liked it, I think about the time when he spanked me so hard I couldn’t sit straight for days, I think about the times we would play in the gym, running around, wrestling and doing Tae Kwon Do. I think about family vacations, I think about his singing, his painting. I think about all the advice his given me, or as he called it, “medicine for your ears”. I think about his sickness, I think about Christmas with Lauren, I think about The Best Song Wedding… most of all, I think about my mom, my sister, my nephew… I think about Lauren and I, about what our children will miss out on if dad’s not here. I think about my trip later today and I think about when and what about the next phone call will be.