I got home around one o’clock on Wednesday, May 28. It was one of the most difficult trips I’ve ever had to take. My stomach was a mess, my mind was racing, my heart was on overdrive and hyperhydrosis was pouring out. I walked in the house through the garage and went straight to my sister’s room to change. I put on my dark suit, took a deep breath and headed out to the gym…

I had missed a day and a half of the viewing. My friend Raul, who picked me up from the airport, said that it had been a very beautiful time yesterday. Lots of people had come by and the pastor had shared a great word. I thought to myself, “how could I have missed that?”… “why couldn’t I be here for that”…

I walked in the gym floor where thousands of classes had been taught. There were a bunch of flowers, chairs and in the front-center was the casket. I walked to the side and snuck my way up to sit next to my mom and sister on the front row. I’ve only been to a couple of viewings and I’ve never been able to walk up front… this was no different. I avoided looking up and just sat there as the Korean Pastor was speaking. I held my mom’s hand and closed my eyes.

After an hour, it was time to head to the church. “Only and hour”, I thought.. “I was only here an hour”. I walked around and said hello to some of the people that were there. I walked back in and saw mom standing by dad and I mustered up the courage to walk up. “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus”… that’s all I could think or say… my heart was broken.

I have no words to describe what I felt when I saw my mom crying next to dad, kissing his forehead and calling his name…”You need to look at him as much as you can… once they close the casket that’s it…” my mom said. And to be honest, I was only able to stand there for a few minutes.. I just couldn’t do it, I couldn’t.

The service was 100% Jesus… the Pastor did an amazing job of preaching Jesus to the people who were there. He spoke about the life of faith that dad led, and how he put Jesus above all else. I know dad was happy that the people there had an opportunity to hear about Jesus… that his students and friends would not only learn from his martial arts, but from his heart for God.

I almost lost it when a group from the Korean Church did a special song … one of my dad’s favorite hymns, Amazing Grace. The same one he blessed us with just a few weeks ago at the wedding.

I got asked to speak and I really didn’t have the words. What came out was words that described a man of honor, respect, sacrifice, discipline, humility… the hard-worker, the dad, the husband. A man who enriched the lives of people around him. A man who led a full life… full of work, students, happiness, sadness, but most of all a life full of love and faith. We did a final bow as students and headed out to the site.

As we drove up to my dad’s final resting place, I was amazed to see the people who were there… people from all walks of life, young and old, rich and poor … from the guy who had to walk there, to the current presidential candidate… from young kids to elderly adults. I remember dad telling me a long time ago that he was blessed to be able to interact with people from all walks of life. That when he died, he was interested to see who would show up… well dad, they were all there…

The week has gotten harder not easier. From teaching classes the next day to hearing my mom cry to airport closures to long bus rides… its been an interesting week. Now that I’m headed back I think about my mom and sister. I just pray from strength and peace from heaven. As I do for myself.